Original 1998 Questionaire
- NAME: Aram Heller
- AGE: None of your Beeswax!
- BIRTHDAY: Can't you read?
- SIGN: The big middle one…
- HEIGHT: 497 picas
- WEIGHT: They Saw The Fat One Coming On
- MARITAL STATUS: Take a wild guess…
- CHILDREN: Point that thing somewhere else
- INSTRUMENTS: None
- FAVORITE ARTIST: Sidewalk Sam
- BIGGEST INFLUENCE: Captain PJ & Happy Hank
- FAVORITE COLOR: Puke green
- FAVORITE FOOD: Matouk’s Hot Calypso Sauce
- FAVORITE DRINK: Coffee, Coffee, Coffee
- LIKES: This band
- DISLIKES: Styx, Journey and all generic bands everywhere
- GOALS: 2 at the World Cup.
- OTHER INTERESTS: My credit card